Ymm would like to Introduce our first Young Dad in Motion: Rahsaan C. McFarland

Detra Davis said it best in her article,” Mama said there’d be days like this,” are strikingly honest lyrics that should be the introduction to the single dad’s national anthem. What mama didn’t say is that the days would sometimes go on, and on, and on, and on. It’s no secret that being a single parent is a tough job, and being a single mom is next to impossible, but being a single dad, now that is a death defying feat.
Single dads are not supposed to exist; it’s a sort of oxymoron; like marital bliss. Fortunately, any dad who takes on the role of single parent “by choice” should receive an Oscar; okay at least a Golden Globe. The knowledge that comes naturally to women does not exist in the pronominal character of a man.
In an interview with Rahsaan, I found out that a single father can go through just as much of turmoil as a single mother. Read about how Rahsaan spends his daddy days with his son RJ and deals with the everyday struggles of being a single parent.

Name: Rahsaan Chase McFarland

Father of:1

Zodiac Sign: Aquarius

Hometown: Queens, New York

About me: I am a NY Native who now lives in Atlanta, GA for the past 5 years with my son RJ. I am a single parent now going on 2 years who has devoted his life and time to my son fulltime with no regrets. I work fulltime as a Cable Field Rep and on my spare time if I’m not enjoying activities with RJ, I’m with my friends and family. I am pretty much what they call a couch potato meaning my idea of content is sitting in my home watching a good game on the television or on my computer.
Aspiring Occupation: A Professional baseball player
A quote that inspires me: Always Bounce back like Flubber! Meaning if I fall I always get right back up!
Hobbies and Interest: I love to play games on my computer and or spend as much quality time with my son as possible because you can’t get their adolescent years back; I also love to travel as much as possible with family and friends; Socialize with friends.
What Parental advice could you give to other moms and or dads? Keep Love as an inspiration to always do your best in anything you do in life!
What are some Trials and Tribulations that made you into the person you are today? Well coming from the hood where I was raised I have seen and been through a lot. I’ve watched many friends and associates leave by death and jail and I never wanted to end up that way so I got that mentality away from me as much as possible and hopefully making sure it would not reach my son or any other generations in my family. I have been through bad encounters that showed me how to be a better man and raise my son to be also. Everyone has something they would change about their selves or their lives; I am just glad that I can identify any wrong to make mine right.
Why do you consider yourself an Ydm? Well because I continue to strive for the best no matter what to give my child the best I can give him. I put him first no matter what and I will always have that thought as a priority! I consider my child in every thought or decision I make regarding my life.

My business: I have no business but I have a MySpace page and Facebook page.

Rahsaan and his Son RJ at his baseball game


50 THINGS A DAD SHOULD KNOW!

1. Babies are a lot tougher than you think, so be gentle.

2. Toddlers will not listen to you, pick your battles.

3. When feeding children 0 to 6 years of age, keep it simple, real simple.

4. Little children have accidents, get over it, learn to clean it up and wait on the next oops…it will happen.

5. Never leave the house without sending everyone to the bathroom first.

6. Always have a first aid kit. Keep one in the house, in the car and at your place of employment.

7. Child proof your home, every inch.

8. Never leave small children alone in the bath tub.

9. Never leave older children to supervise small children alone in the bath tub.

10. When tending to your children, allow the phone or cell phone to ring, the voice mail will pick up the call. Who ever it is, they can wait. Your children are a priority.

11. Play with your children.

12. Sing with your children. (Sing anyway)

13. Entertain your children. Act silly, tell jokes, have fun with your children.

14. Take pride in how your children look. Clean, well fitting, color coordinated clothing is key. Keep it simple. (Gently used is okay…honest)

15. Teach your children that cleanliness is next to….well, you know….BATHE from head to toe.

16. Some small children need to use deodorant.

17. Talk to your mother, female friend, or female physician about female hygiene concerns.

18. Talk to your children about sex, drugs, video games, porn sites and all other issues covered in the newspaper and on television, before they hear it or learn of it outside their home.

19. Keep a family photo album.

20. Take photos of special events and everyday activities.

21. Watch your children play, study, and interact with one another, learn about their personality.

22. Don’t ever, ever be afraid to tell your children “NO”…Just say “NO” (Give a short explanation, but don’t renege.)

23. Organize your family life, a lack of structure is stressful to you and your children (it’s okay tohave a schedule…up at 7 a.m., dinner at 6:30 p.m. lights out at 8 p.m.) You know.

24. Show and tell your children how to behave, set the example.

25. “I hate you,” and “I wish you were dead” are common expressions used by all children and teens at least once in their life, expect to hear it

26. Your children are human, they will get angry. Allow a cool down period and then talk, listen, talk, listen, talk, listen, listen, listen.

27. Tweens (children 10-14) are all knowing; always go behind them and check everything they say and do.

28. Teenagers are all knowing and all doing, always go behind them, under them, around, them and through them, checking everything they say and do.

29. Give your children chores; there are no free lunches in life

30. Insist your teenagers work; it builds character and prepares them for the reality of life.

31. Never buy your child a car or any expensive item; they will care for it better if they have invested in it 100%.

32. Never get your child a cell phone unless they can pay for it themselves. If you must, use a phone that allows limited calling i.e. a Firefly (I am not plugging this, it’s just an example) if you must provide a method of communicating with your child.

33. Do not buy your child anything they want, they will not respect you or appreciate the purchase.

34. Tell your daughters the truth about how boys really think.

35. Encourage your children to celebrate life and be happy.

36. Encourage your children to understand the mind/body connection and take care of both.

37. Eat health foods.

38. Plant a garden with your children.

39. Provide opportunities for your children to succeed, sports, board games, cooking.

40. Praise your children from being good, loving caring people when they display those behaviors.

41. Expose your children to the possibilities in life, encourage them to dream big dreams.

42. Never be jealous of your children.

43. Love your children unconditionally, there will be times when this is difficult, or impossible; just do it.

44. Learn to let go of your children and let them fail, it really does build character.

45. Learn to wait before helping your children out of financial difficulty. Allow them to figure out the solution for themselves.

46. Know that children are particularly emotionally dependent on single parents.

47. Know that single parents are particularly emotionally dependent on their children.

48. Learn to live and love apart.

49. Appreciate all the ups and downs of raising your children and know you did the best you could and that was alright.

50. Celebrate a job well done!